nattskatta

I have cuddled up in my bed with a cup of tea, a warm cat and my laptop to think and write loads of nonsense. Wonderfully cosy, despite the fact that the cold makes my brain work. On some planes a least, I have done nothing practical tonight -like packing for my three month stay in England - but that didn't feel exactly necesary either. I try to plan so I only will have to be effective for one day (the day before I leave Sweden). Good luck I say.

The fact that I'm going to England feels unreal. But still it's very real, and a little scary too. The last weeks I've managed to drown my anxiety in social life, and tomorrow I will continue doing that, it being New Year's eve and all. Maybe it will not get real until I actually get there. Very possible.

Outside it's bitterly cold, snowy and the moon is shining hysterically. It's an inspiring night but I'll have to sleep soon, so I not happen to inecessarily reverse everything. Too bad, this is the kind of night when some part of me howls at the moon and runs wild in the woods. I will miss it.
But goodnight everyone.

Today it's five years since a tsunami washed over the shores of the Indian ocean and killed thousands of people. A few of them were Swedes and we couldn't just shake it off like we usually do when such things happen in distant corners of the world. At the time I was in the eighth grade and one of my classmates was spending the vacation in Thailand. She never returned. Every year by this time, the slightly guilt-tinged memories emerge, and therefore I write this in memory of Mio. A sad theme for a supposedly happy holiday, but it's there nontheless.

Today it's Christmas Day and everybody is bugging me about
the fact that I've been blogging very little recently. I
have my reasons of course (one has to have reasons for
everything, right?). But where to start? To sum it up;
Visingsö was, as I said earlier, interesting, and to my
satisfaction I learned much about watercolour painting and
a little acrylic too. I had the chance to get to know lots
of lovely people, and as things go, there was one person
who was particularly nice to get to know. It would be very
easy now, to blame all my abscense on him, so I better
not, but he is part of the explanation. I will say no
more. But won't be able to keep myself, so sooner orlater,
details will emerge, I guess.

Now I will try to fight myself into the Now and the
Future. But this is hard because a new year and decade is
descending on us and this is the time when everyone is
looking back at the past year in an attempt to label it.
Define and measure it. I wont be able to keep myself from
doing that later either. But later is later. Now is time
for home made glögg with whiskey, gingerbread with blue
cheese and Esperanza pouring out of the speakers. That's Christmas Day.